New Age Lifestyle

We spend most of Christmas and New Year traveling to see friends and family so we are a vanilla couple for pretty much all of our time. As we’ll be exchanging gifts in the company of others, I have made sure I have some gifts that are for his public gender role and be mindful of what he opens when we are with folks who are not aware of his sissy side.

Male presents are pretty straight forward. He does like to read and so I’ll gift a range of books or maybe male clothing items he needs. When we are alone I can give him some sissy gifts. This year he got a fluffy pink robe, a “Miffy” pyjama set, and gift sets from Soap and Glory and Byoma. While we were traveling around I picked up a fashion bracelet and a random selection of nail polishes as we were out sale shopping.

- Claire.

I would agree with @ccponyboy on this one. There is nothing wrong with the concept of a parade but a parade is more about the show of solidarity and the celebration of a lifestyle rather than an education.

I do like the idea of a mansion party. My own frustration is that I was married for a number of years before I even knew what FLR was. So, I would like more women to be aware of the of the lifestyle even if they ultimately dismiss it. I have often wondered how it could be possible to reach out to more women to increase FLR awareness. A mansion party might be a nice approach. I would suggest a Champagne reception followed by a few guest speakers who would introduce the topic and give examples from their own lifestyle. I’d finish with cocktails and a chance to mingle and ask questions on a more private basis.

I would hope women would leave with enough knowledge to be able to navigate sites like this and understand the variety of FLRs, the techniques involved, and the reasons for adopting the lifestyle.

- Claire.       

My sissy started wearing a Fufu clip at the start of this year and I have found it beneficial for both of us. When we first moved to FLR, I fitted him in chastity devices but, for various reasons, they didn’t really work for us.

For Jemima, the first advantage is in the original function of the clip by hiding his male lump. He had tended to avoid leggings, tight skirts, or anything that would reveal his true gender by showing a lump where there should not be one. He only wears women’s clothing at home and the only other person to see him will be me. So, in a sense it does not really matter as I am aware of his true gender, but it does matter to him. The clip gives him the correct silhouette. I also understand from what Jemima tells me that there is a kind of psychological aspect to it as well. He enjoys the sensation of looking down and finding a familiar shape missing. In effect it is the symbolic removal of his manhood.

I would recommend trying Fufu clips to any sissy. The devices themselves are cheap and so if they don’t work for you then you have not had a significant outlay. They are easy to clean and keep out of sight. Jemima tells me that the clips are not painful to wear and is comfortable in them for most of a day. Fitting them does take some practice, so be prepared to work on that. In the early days it might have taken some ten minutes or so of prodding and poking to get the clip fitted properly but this time will drop with practice. They are easier to fit if someone else does it; I can clip him quicker then he can clip himself. He removes the clip for bathroom visits and he says that it sometimes does come free on it’s own.

As a Mistress, it works well for me too. It’s use in feminisation is clear. I’ll punish Jemima for signs of masculinity and general male attitudes. Given that he has no issue wearing the clip and that there is probably no bigger sign of masculinity than having a boyish lump in your panties, it makes it a sensible rule to have that it must be worn. I can either see that the clip is fitted, or I can run my finger over the target area. If the clip is missing or badly fitted then he is clearly not taking feminisation seriously and he’ll be feeling my hairbrush on his behind. Whist I stopped using chastity devices, it is nice to have something fitted “down there”. In terms of intimacy, it’s a pleasing sensation to un-clip and then re-clip him when I have finished with him. The routine of using the clip emphasizes my control. He remains (figuratively) without his manhood until I decide otherwise.

As the Fufu clip works for both of us in different ways, the routines we have surrounding it make it a pleasurable aspect of our FLR.

- Claire.

It is important for me that, although in FLR, we remain as a married couple so we share our room. We do the role-reversal thing so Jemima acts as a wife and not a maid. Most of our morning routines, especially on weekdays, are based around the practicalities of going to work. Although there are some small FLR aspects in the mix too. Jemima will tend to be up and dressed first and will prepare coffee and a light breakfast. Most weekdays he’ll also prepare my pack up lunch. I expect Jemima to have made sure that my work clothes are cleaned and ironed, but he won’t actually dress me. I’ll get ready while he is in the kitchen.

From the FLR side, I do expect Jemima to be dressed and present properly as Jemima. Even on days he will change into male drab to go to work in the office. Officially, this is to enforce feminization and the idea that, in this house, he is an obedient housewife at all times. Even if it’s just for an hour in the morning, there is no excuse. There is a practical side to this. Sometimes, especially in busy summer weeks, the amount of time he can spend as Jemima does go down and as we are not acting in our desired roles our FLR can slip slightly. It’s a reminder to us both to keep things on track.

We don’t have a set bedtime on any day. We to tend to go to bed together and if one of us is not tired then the other will read. My FLR requirement at bedtime is that Jemima must do his feminine skin care routine. Although a rule, it’s not meant to be a chore. As there are days when he can’t spend anytime as Jemima, this rule is meant to give him some time to connect with his feminine side. It’s a chance to chill out and have some girlie time before bedtime.

Through experience I have found that managing his time and chores directly doesn’t really work. We both need space and time to get on with our day-to-day lives. Instead, I just expect him to dress and act as a good obedient housewife. He can manage the household chores and run the domestic aspects of the household as he wishes so long as he understands there are consequences for not being a good wife.

- Claire.   

Hi,

Here are one Mistress’s opinions...

Was having your husband or boyfriend a sissy your idea or his?

A bit of both really. My partner has always cross-dressed so I wasn’t turning him into a sissy as he already was one. When we moved to FLR it made sense to incorporate feminisation into our lifestyle as he was always going to have the desire to cross-dress at some point anyway. As his Mistress, I took the lead in his feminisation to give the impression it was forced upon him. Feminisation is a key part of our FLR and I am strict with it. But, I would not be enforcing it if he did not have the interest to begin with.

How did you feel the first time you saw him in a sissy dress or maid uniform?

A little different for us as he wears neither of these outfits. As a cross-dresser he always dressed for realism, often passing in public as female in the past. The first time I saw him dressed up I didn’t recognize him at first. He wears mainstream feminine clothing with a cute girly theme. For me, it’s about the act of feminisation rather the outfits. He doesn’t own any sissy dresses or maid’s uniforms. That’s not really our dynamic.

Have you shared him with friends or family or is it all done in private?

It’s a private thing for us. He does not cross-dress in public or in front of family and friends. Outside of our home we act a little more vanilla. The FLR aspect if our relationship – where I lead – is full time, but I try to tone it down a bit in public.

Would you like this to be fulltime in the future?

Probably not. Feminisation is full time in private and we both have varying fantasies about having him in his feminine form in public, but I think they will remain a fantasy. We have got to a point where we can balance the lifestyle with the flow of everyday life.

Hope this helps,
- Claire.

When we first moved to FLR I was curious how long sissies wore their chastity devices for and how long could be considered a safe length of time. In my original plan, whilst he’d be wearing the clip most of the time, it would not be for long periods. I use my sissy for intimacy, so the device would be removed for that. I’d also bought two devices with the aim of regularly swapping then out for cleaning. He’d be unlocked and then supervised while washing with the loss of privacy adding to the embarrassment of being caged. I had even considered insisting that it was only me that would unlock, wash, dry, and re-lock his manhood to re-enforce the idea that it was exclusively my property.

We had various issues when we started, and to be honest about it, I don’t need to use chastity devices for discipline or control. It was through this forum that I found out about Fufu clips – a small plastic device that folds though the skin of the manhood. Correctly fitted these will hide any bulge and clothing will lie flat against the body. This works better for both of us. The clip can give the illusion that the manhood has been removed completely which does please my sissy. I punish my sissy for any sign of masculinity and having the rule forbidding any visible lump in his panties fits in nicely with this. Depending on his outfit, I can either see that the clip is fitted properly or a simple touch with my fingertip will tell me in cases where a flared skirt or dress would naturally hide this. Any sign of a nasty boyish lump and he’ll be feeling my hairbrush across his behind.

My sissy is always feminised in private and the clip is compulsory. He didn’t like wearing the chastity device but enjoys wearing the clip. He likes the way his panties fit better and that notion that I am somehow forcing the removal his manhood. I’m very happy to tease him about how he shouldn’t have any visible male lump now that he is a feminised sissy wife. It does give a nice feeling that we are working together to ensure he is being feminine and obedient.

I won’t get rid of my chastity devices and I do use them in various situations or games. I doubt we’d ever get to a point where he would be locked in one for four weeks but I have been experimenting with having him locked for blocks of about four days.   
 
- Claire.

Whilst we practice FLR as a lifestyle some aspects - like cross-dressing - are only done in private. I generally regard our FLR as a private thing. When outside our home I do try find a balance between continuing the principals of FLR whist being discreet about it. Although we try to keep a part of our lifestyle hidden, there are inevitable moments when one world is revealed briefly to the other. 

I have two advantages when dealing with family. Before we moved to FLR Jemima had been poorly for a number of months. Because of this I’d taken up the general running of the household and was generally making the decisions. When Jemima recovered nobody really noticed that he did not resume the traditional man of the house role. Family have generally always spoken with me when it comes to asking what our plans are and making arrangements. Also, Jemima’s cross-dressing is pretty much an open secret within the family. He does not cross-dress in front of family, nor would he wear feminine clothes under male clothes if he knows he would meet family members, but his preference is known. I know a few have seen photos of Jemima in his full femme but none have actually witnessed it. I have had a few oops moments when using the wrong name. When I have done this family members have either ignored the reference or assumed I am making a little joke at his expense since they know exactly whom I am referring to.

The workplace is more difficult as oops moments are more subtle. I am not going to ‘out’ my partner’s cross-dressing or our lifestyle in general, but I have found that misplaced comments can lead to conversations I do not want to have. For example, when I have mentioned in passing conversation that my partner cooks and cleans, it has been picked up on by co-workers. Especially female ones who have made “Where did you find such a man?” type comments. These are harmless enough, but in my mind these are too close to questions about my lifestyle. It’s also worth remembering too that, whilst my co-workers would probably not eavesdrop, what you say on a cell phone can be overheard and a text message flashing on a screen naturally attracts attention. In private, I refer to my partner in the feminine, so not only the use of his female name but also my suggestions that he “be a good girl.” would also seem odd if overheard. I have had quite involved conversations with my sissy only to realize I could have been overheard. Nobody has ever commented, so I am guessing that is my paranoia.

I find FLR in public quite tricky sometimes. I don’t expect Jemima to cross-dress in public and the concepts of potential public embarrassment and humiliation are definitely not a part of my style of FLR. I never order my my sissy about in public or in private but I do sometimes noticeably take the lead. I try to take the role of husband in a way and look out for and care for him as a husband might care for a wife, but for a woman to take the lead in this way it can look as though I am talking down to him or being condescending which is certainly not my intention. There have been cases where I have probably come across as a bossy arrogant woman. It also bothers me that people might think I nag Jemima or that he is hen-pecked in any way as, to my mind, this is the direct reverse of what good FLR is all about.

- Claire.